During every planning session I have with a client, we go over 3 types of music. There are the “MUST PLAY” songs, the “I DON’T CARE” song, and the “DON’T PLAY IT IF YOU WANT TO LIVE” songs. Typically, most clients have several titles for the first two categories, however they tend to not think of any song that they just don’t want played. That usually changes as we converse and songs get added to the don’t play list. Here are a few guidelines to make sure that the music provided for your event is everything you want and more.

While I can not cover every possibility and suggestion for songs that shouldn’t be played at an event, I will suggest a few of the common scenarios that I deal with.

YOUTH EVENTS

Most youth are trying to be at the forefront of music, have an exceptionally diverse music taste, and are trying to push the edge of every social boundary. They will want music played that is current and edgy.  In order to keep school administrators and parents happy, I find myself saying “NO” to kids coming and making a request, and it’s usually based on the following guidelines:

• Overtly sexually themed songs
• Songs that demean a race or gender
• Songs that have excessive swearing or other offensive language

WEDDINGS

Weddings should be 100% driven by the bride and groom, what they say they want to happen, should be the case.  I do make recommendations when I meet with them prior to their wedding day.  What I suggest is radio edits of all the songs they play, and stress that friends and family of all ages will be in attendance, so to be open to playing more than their favorite songs and bands.

When I ask what songs they do NOT want played, I usually get a blank look, however I do ask one question of the bride that will tend to bring a song or two to the list.  “Did you and a former boyfriend have your special ‘song’ that makes you think of him for good or bad when you hear it played?”  That is one song that a bride never wants to hear at her wedding.  As a general rule guys don’t put that type of emotional attachment to a song, but occasionally a groom will speak up and add his song to the list as well.

GENERAL EVENTS

While there is no hard rule on what music should and should not be played at any event the previously mentioned guidelines regarding language and content could be a good rule of thumb.  Additionally, the music should fit the event.  For a high school class of 1965 reunion, it probably wouldn’t be practical to play the top 100 songs from 1986.  For a formal dance it’s important to play more slow songs.  While I am a fan of the music by Ozzy Osbourne, I wouldn’t normally suggest playing it during the time while waiting for a wedding ceremony to begin

Ultimately the event host should have final say on the music played at his or her event.

As we approach the colder time of the year, many Brides, Grooms, and Party Planners are trying to squeak in that last outdoor event of the year.  I will be the first to admit that an outdoor wedding or party with fall colors can be amazingly beautiful!  I would suggest, however, that any such plans also include a contingency plan, or “Plan-B”.

Every party plan this time of year (it’s not a bad idea any time of year) should include a “Plan-B” just in case.  In 2007 I had the opportunity to be a part of the wedding between Kevin and Kendra at a beautiful venue near Park City, UT in late September.  Kendra was determined that she would have a garden wedding ceremony, however, Mother Nature had ideas of her own.  What started as an overcast morning became an afternoon shower turned that turned into an early Utah snowfall.

Unfortunately, Kendra didn’t have a “Plan-B” and the ceremony was very short as the guests quickly filled the seats, the bridal party filed in, the couple was quickly married, and everyone squeezed into the small reception center.

Fortunately, I DID have a “Plan-B” for her wedding.  I used plastic covers for the speakers that were needed for the outside ceremony, set up an additional sound system in the reception room, and, in the end, made sure everyone had a good time.  While I am seeming to brag, what I really want to express is that I was prepared for the possibility that something might go wrong.

When working with an event professional, DJ, Event Planner, Caterer, etc., any party host will want to make sure that the companies hired to ensure the success of an event will have the ability to make adjustments as needed.  The party host will also want to make sure that there is definitely a “Plan-B” for just in case!

My son returned from a week long Boy Scout camping trip wearing a shirt from the camp.  When asked, my son told her that one of the leaders, that didn’t even go on the camp, had sent money to have shirts purchased for each of the scouts that went.

On hearing this story, my wife instructed my son that he needed to send a “Thank You” card to the leader for paying for his shirt.

It’s ALWAYS a good idea to say “Thank You” when someone deserves it.

What made this even more timely was a message I had on my cell phone to call a prior client 3 months after the event.

Ryan and Nicole Turner were married on May 6, 2011 and I was truly honored to be a part of that wonderful celebration.

When I called Ryan, I was truly humbled by the heartfelt thanks that he sent my way.  He told me at least 3 times to please have future clients call him if they wanted a glowing recommendation regarding my services.

I don’t tell this story to “Toot My Own Horn” but to use it as an example of the best thing any client can do.  If you hire a vendor, for example, a Disc Jockey for your Wedding, if they meet, or even better, exceed your expectations, please tell them “THANK YOU” for the service they provided.

My suggestion for making the message even more meaningful is to deliver it After the event, like Ryan did.  I also took this as a lesson for myself, and am committing to start sending personalized “Thank You” cards to each of my clients after the event.

So, in the spirit of this post… THANK YOU!  Thank you to my wonderful wife for being an inspiration.  Thank You to all my clients, Past and Present, for making my journey through this wonderful experience as a DJ amazing beyond words, creating friendships I couldn’t have ever imagined.  Thank You, also, to all of you for taking the time to read my little blog.

How Could You Say My Name Wrong, I'm Your Main Sponsor!

Let me begin this article with the statement that NOBODY IS PERFECT!

I have been fortunate to be in the DJ industry for well over 20 years, and unfortunately the internet wasn’t a major presence for advice back when I started as an DJ Entertainer in northern Utah, I had to learn too many “skills” from my own mistakes.

For example, my worst “screw up” was at a rather large company picnic. I was asked to do the  drawing and announcing of prizes.  One of the winning entries I drew and announced over the sound system was a Mrs. Rapich that was Supposed to be pronounced (Wrap-Ich) not (Rape-Ich).  I felt rather embarrassed when she corrected me as she collected her prize.  To make the story even better, she’s now the secretary for my insurance agent, and I still get an occasional teasing about it several years later.

Because we don’t live in a world where “Jane Smith” and “John Brown” are the only types of name that  people have, and Acme is not the only type of business name, it’s very important to get the names right.

One of the easiest ways to ensure that the names of guests or sponsors are pronounced correctly is to spell it phonetically on note cards or the program that will be used by the announcer.  I’m fully aware that not everyone can truly write in phonetics, I sure can’t.  What can be done to ensure that names are pronounced correctly is to do your own custom phonetics.  For example, if you are at a wedding for a bride named Kirsten, to ensure that her name is pronounced correctly, put (Keer-Sten) including the parentheses next to her name.  If you are at an event where one of the sponsors is the car company Hyundai it might be important to put (Hun-Day) next to the name.  Every person wants you to Say It Right when it comes to their personal or company name.

The majority of mistakes can be avoided by executing the plan put together before the event.  As a DJ, I find it’s critical to ensure that as many details as possible are covered in the planning sessions before an event takes place.  At all my planning meetings, I try to identify with the client any potential name confusion and clarify it well in advance, this can make all the difference to both myself and my client.

To re-quote my opening statement, Nobody Is Perfect it’s also important to IMMEDIATELY fix the mistake.  If a name is pronounced wrong, it’s important to the victim (for lack of a better term) to make the correction and a simple apology.  When it happens to me, I make a joke about it, with myself as the “butt” of the joke.  Laughter can usually fix any minor human error.

I receive lots of questions from couples who ask: “Are email wedding invitations an appropriate option for my celebration?” Now I am a little biased, but I think email wedding invitations are a smart, savvy and sophisticated choice!  My husband and I sent email wedding invitations for our own wedding in 2007 (supplemented with 5 simple paper invitations for our older relatives.)  Our guests loved them and they made wedding planning SO much easier for me.

Here’s why:

1)     They save LOTs of time!
Think about the time it takes to collect everyone’s snail mail address, stuff and address envelopes, and stick all the stamps.  I certainly had better things to do with my weekends!

2)     They save trees
Let’s state the obvious – between wedding cards, envelopes, RSVP cards, RSVP envelopes, and anything else stuffed inside envelopes – It’s a lot of paper. Yikes!

3)     They save your budget
The postage alone for 150 invitations and RSVP reply cards costs around US $150. Plus the average couple in the US spends between US$650-850 on the actual invitations. That’s a lot of budget that could go towards food, wine and music.

4)     They offer instant RSVP Gratification
The thing we loved the most about email wedding invitations and online RSVPs was that we could instantly see who had opened them and who had responded. The night we sent our invitations, we stayed up until 3am refreshing the site and high-fiving one another with happiness at each ‘YES!’ response.

5)     They are convenient for your guests
One thing I hear over and over from Glö couples is how much their guests have loved receiving email invitations and RSVPing online. Guests have all the information they need at their fingertips and can easily RSVP for themselves and anyone else in their party. Plus they can access the information at any time on a computer or smart phone, or they can decide whether to print anything out to stick on the fridge or carry with them to the celebration.

6)     They can be beautiful
Paperless invitations have come a LONG way since e-vite. Check out some examples and see what I mean…

Email wedding invitations aren’t right for every couple, but they definitely make a statement. They say, “we’re modern, smart and savvy – we care about making our wedding fun and easy for our guests to attend.”

I am constantly amazed at how each Glö-couple’s personality shines through in their email wedding invitations and wedding website designs. For some inspiration – check out the real Glö-bie posts on glo-bride.com

About Taryn: Taryn is the founder of Glö, where she works to provide modern-minded couples with personalized online wedding communications — from email invitations and save the dates, to wedding websites with online RSVPs. Learn more about Glö at www.glosite.com or follow Taryn and her staff on Twitter  @GloWedding.

Last week was my birthday, and I figured what better way to celebrate than to give away some gifts to readers of my blog.

I started the Shellimark Entertainment Birthday Club for this purpose and am asking everyone to sign up.  For every 20 people that sign up between now and July 31st, I will give away an ITUNES Gift Card.  It’s simple to enter, click on the link above or below, fill out the form sharing with me your birthday (the Year is optional), and submit it.  I’ll send you a confirmation email and verify your entry into the contest.

Don’t worry, I won’t share this information, and won’t all of a sudden start sending you a bunch of emails, I plan to use this to hold random contests as well as send a special Wish my readers on their birthday and anniversary.

CLICK HERE TO SIGN UP FOR THE SHELLIMARK ENTERTAINMENT BIRTHDAY CLUB!

Some of my favorite memories from my wedding were not captured by my photographer, but by friends and family at the event.  While I can’t over-express the importance of a professional photographer for capturing the special moments of, they can’t be everywhere at all times of an event.

While this tends to happen primarily at weddings; I have seen the use of disposable cameras for guests to take “casual” photos from the point of view of the guest at all types of gatherings.

All to often when I see cameras at an event, they have been left in the middle of the tables for guest to use at the party, and hopefully left behind for the host to get developed.  Sadly, this usually is not a productive practice!  All too often, the pictures taken are by kids that get ahold of the camera, and snap the shutter as fast as it will go.  There also tends to be a large percentage of cameras that are either lost or damaged.

Of those that get back into the hands of the host and are taken in for development, an exceptionally high percentage of the pictures taken are not useable for any type of memory.

It’s the “proper” use of a disposable camera that can save money and friendships!

Here’s my advice on using this tool in creating lasting memories, and strengthening friendships:  DO NOT leave cameras on tables for the guests!

To use a typical wedding as an example, the majority of bride and grooms have more friends in their circle than is reasonable to have in a bridal party as a bridesmaid or groomsman.  Take the opportunity to ask one of those friends that is not in the bridal party if they would be willing to be responsible for one of the cameras.  By giving the camera to a specific individual and asking them to take some photos, that friend will help the bride remember the wedding from their point of view.  Involving a friend will also accomplish a few things:

1. The friend will feel as if they are a special part of the day instead of one of those “left out” of the bridal party.
2. The person with the camera will make a conscious effort to take good pictures at the event.
3. The camera will be accounted for and will not be as likely to get lost or damaged.
4. The cost of developing will not be any less, however, the cost per usable photo will drop dramatically.

While a friend with a camera isn’t a substitute for a seasoned photographic professional, it can make a difference in the friendship by allowing it to grow stronger.

One such area is the look of the men in attendance.  The bride and bridesmaids tend to get the most focus, however, paying special attention to the Groom and Groomsmen can add a touch of elegance to the event.

I’d never be so arrogant as to think I have all the answers / advice available.  I am a fan of the blog at www.TheBrideAndGroom.com.  They recently posted an article entitled “Great Tips for Grooms and Groomsmen.”  The guys from Beckett & Robb, writers of the article, offer some amazing tips to bring that extra elegant touch to the wedding.

Let me know what you think, I personally think it’s invaluable advice.

Bubbles Galore

I had the privilege to be a part of Mitch and Jessie’s wedding on June 4th.  As a DJ over the years at numerous weddings, I have been pleasantly surprised a number of times!  I love it when I find a new way to make something better for each Bride and Groom I get to work with.

Jessie and Mitch, like most couples at their wedding reception, had a toast offered by the Best Man, as well as a few of their friends and family.  While this, in and of itself, is not usually considered extraordinary; what I learned later made it so.

The glasses that they used for their toast was the same pair that her mom and dad used for toasting each other at their wedding.  When Jessie’s mom was going to discard them a while back, Jessie took them and kept them in her closet for 5 years, saving them for her wedding day.

Many brides try to save their wedding dress, hoping that a daughter or daughter-in-law might wear it on a future occasion.  While this is a great sentiment, most dresses fail to survive the test of time.  Glasses, however, are not subject to moths, yellowing, water damage, etc.

I will admit that this tradition won’t have an impact on any weddings in the near future, however, how special would it be many years from now to say to your friends and family that the bride and groom are using the same glasses that you used at your wedding.